Artist Statement Translated

Artist Statement Translated

hello I'd like you to meet a friend of mine sunflower sunflower Morgenstern hi sunflowers parents moved to California from the Midwest in the late 60s and that's where she was born her parents hippies and they named her sunflower Sun flower seriously who does that to a child yes I hate my name but my mom still where is sunflowers in her hair they're still hippies after all these years so what am I supposed to do anyway when she was in school they encouraged her to pursue a career in the arts and she has recently left the university to begin her career as a ceramic artist that's right I am now a ceramic artist people need to realize this I have documentation from the University that confirms this it's in the Prius I can get it I have a diploma no that's okay anyway sunflower has written an artist statement which is very sophisticated as she is a university sanctioned ceramic artist she has asked me here today to help you better understand the philosophical vernacular describing the meaning and purpose behind her work artist statements can sometimes be difficult for the layman to understand I'm doing this merely as a public service also sunflower owes me $50 and said I wouldn't get it back unless I helped her with this well yes that's true are you ready to translate for me so I can start making some sales sure let's begin go ahead whenever you're ready my name is sunflower I am a ceramic artist her name is sunflower it sounds like an artist's name she is a ceramic artist I entered the university hoping to continue the ceramic traditions of functional potters ahead grown to admire my intent was to focus on functional pottery pottery made out of pottery we'll mugs bowls plates pitchers things people could use everyday ultimately my ceramic art while visual became primarily conceptual in nature exploring various three-dimensional constructs making political societal socio-economic socio psychological and socio philosophical statements to enhance existing aesthetic paradigms from a ceramic point of view artists do that sort of thing we had only two wheels in our ceramics department one was broken and I couldn't get the clay centered on the other one so I sort of branched out to pursue other things my intention with clay is to conceptually link to connect as it were it's natural unprocessed wet raw visual forms with the bovine defecation associated with my historical Midwestern roots thus exploring an aspect of my ancestors heritage through clay I decided that since I could not Center clay on a wheel that I would explore its natural wet chunky appearance as cow dung my work has attempted to elevate the unfettered three-dimensional representations of these symbolic and quasi metaphoric socio-economic bovine defecation through gallery exhibits and video documented representations of the gallery installation process I have placed the unfired raw wet clay in chunks on high gallery pedestals to simulate cow dung and have recorded this process in an attempt to legitimize the aesthetic merits of this effort I am deeply indebted to the university educational system for my progress as a ceramic artist I currently owe $34,000 in student loans please help me I'm still living in my parents basement and they have no appreciation or understanding of my cow dung installation and they are free-thinking hippies if they don't understand or appreciate my ceramic art we will I'm called most of the time seriously cold even with a hoodie I'm currently creating radical cynical hand-built symbolic representations of my current circumstance my parents basement isn't heated I'm really pissed off and wishing I graduated with a business major I'm now making chunky amorphous violent stuff that I stab with a 10-inch knife I work at Taco Bell she works at Taco Bell Thanks that's about it do you think my sales will increase now will people understand and respect the fact that I am a ceramic artist should I go get the diploma well here's what I think give me my $50

6 thoughts on “Artist Statement Translated

  1. LOL, much better than most of the stabs at humor re: the artist statement! Sadly, a lot of the reason there ARE artists 'living in their parents' basements' is that neither art school nor choosing not to go to art school is a way to learn art business. I hope that schools include it now. I'm so glad that when I was asked the first time to write an artist's statement, I had no clue it was supposed to be hard. Relieved of that stress, I just wrote it and it was fine.

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